Chapter 2
Frisky Frances
The Hub.
A nine-story cylinder of a building. On the second floor, where lust runs rampant, the Nephilim isn’t there to play around. Not yet. He’s no stranger to the nightlife but the Hub is his brother’s territory. An altercation with his twin is the last thing he wants, so he’s gotta make this quick.
He jogs around to the windowed double doors of the club and takes a peak through the grimy glass. Having overheated from using his powers a few minutes prior, he removes his jacket to cool down.
He considers ordering a cold drink and scopes out the bar. Walking coatless past the other patrons, his muscles exposed, this earns him a thick-nailed pinch that nearly rips his pants. When he turns around, he’s met with…
A tongue-rolling, gothic witch boy, one with a bobcat-like familiar purring on his shoulder.
A bit in shock that his ass was nearly mauled by another dude, the Devil Hunter watches him hop on a barstool and cross his slender legs. He’s quite salacious, suggestively mouthing the straw of his fruity cocktail and shamelessly undressing him with his glowing-red eyes.
“Mmm, well aren’t you a hot piece of meat. I’m Klarion and I’m new around here.”
“You should leave this place. It’s not safe for children or animals.”
“Oooo, he thinks I’m in trouble! Me and Teekl are perfectly fine, but your concern is touching. You don’t know when you’re talking to one of the bad guys, do you.”
“I know you probably got pulled into Limbo against your will.”
“Actually you’re wrong. My chaotic powers open rifts on their own. Nobody forced me to be here. I came because I’m looking for a good time. You look just like Vergil. Mmm, yummy.”
“You shouldn’t trust Vergil.”
Yawn, “I do what I want, but if it makes you feel better, I’m not part of his little experiment. He’s still trying to repopulate Limbo City by pulling people into his regime from the Human World. Ever since he discovered that rift in Gotham City-”
“You mean where Batman lives.”
“Ha! The look on your face. Like some starstruck civilian. Yes, that’s where Batman lives. The guy is super overrated, I would know. I bet I could kill him.”
“Robin would stop you.”
“Funny you should mention Robin. Earlier today, after the final haul from Arkham Asylum, after Vergil took the last of the prisoners and stuck ‘em in the biggest holding room he has, we discovered a real dud in the group. Useless.”
“What’s your point?”
“We dumped that vigilante-wannabe into the woods when the sun went down. One of the inmates put him in a chokehold right as he was waking up, then we shoved him down a hill, into a creek. It was fun.”
“You’re a terrible person. Got it.”
“That little Bat-brat didn’t crossover in one piece. The Divine Harpies are gonna peck his stupid little eyes out, and eat his rotten little tooth. Right, Teekl?”
“Mra-ow!”
“UuuuUGG! Tongue! You know I meant TONGUE!!!”
“Mraaaw!”
“If he’s near the woods, I’ll find him.”
“Not likely. A Joker demon was practically foaming at the mouth over the chance to torment a little birdie boy again. But enough about that. Let’s talk me and you.”
“Let’s not.”
“Oooo feisty! I love a juicy rascal with a six pack. I also enjoy long walks on the beach and setting villages on fire. So what’s your sign, big boy?”
Rowdiness from the dance floor, one wall over, interrupts their conversation.
“Deviously delightful! Ooo, look at him, Teekl, biting his tongue and his lip. Sticking his hand down his shirt and rubbing his nipples. And your cheeks are flush! You getting hard? Me too.”
“It’s getting frisky in here, mmm.”
“Ugh, are you here for Frisky Frances like the rest of these boneheads? She’s got some hot moves but, you know who she really is, right?”
“Oh I know all about her.”
“Wait… you’ve been inside of her, haven’t you.”
“Wooo, she’s making me sweat again. You gonna finish that ice?”
“No, take it.”
Klarion passes him the glass of shaved ice, left over from his drink. He pours it in his mouth.
“Ever been with another guy before, Devil Hunter?”
“No,” he crunches while Klarion pouts.
“Hmph, another typical dude-bro, Teekl.”
“Whatever, you don’t know me.”
“I know you’re not up for breaking the rules.”
“My entire existence happened because my parents broke the rules.”
“The Demon King did say once to me, that his mom and dad were forbidden lovers or something retarded like that.”
“Something retarded, huh? Yo, the reason I’m not into you, Klarion, is cause I’m not into teenagers.”
“Teekl knows I’m much older than I look.”
“Raaow.”
“I’m not buying it.”
“Frisky Frances will bash your brains in if you’re not careful, stud muffin.”
“Better than a witch boy biting my dick off.”
“Dang it, why does everybody always assume that?! Hey, where are you going?"
“See ya, Klarion.”
He puts on his jacket, covers his head with his inverted red hood, and enters the club.
Later, when the time is right, he enters the stairwell and hears his name.
“Psst Dante!”
Hiding in the corner, the door concealing her every time someone opens it… even he didn’t see her.
“Frances.”
Leaning against the white-painted brick under the florescent lights, she wears a white slip, a black leather jacket and matching knee-high boots. She’s beautiful but he’s saddened to see her eyeliner smeared from tears of rage. He assures her sweetly…
“Awe nah. Hey, it’s gonna be alright. Here.”
He pulls her out of the corner and wraps his arm around her. She frets.
“I tried to get my money before the show but now they’re saying they ain’t gonna pay me. All because I kicked some gorilla in the head, cause he was giving me shit while I was on the pole.”
“I know baby, I saw.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah, well now there’s a demon chasing after me. I hate Limbo City.”
He rubs her shoulders.
“Shhh, you know it’s not your fault this place doesn’t have bouncers. I had a feeling you might need some help tonight.”
“Thank fuck for that!” she laughs, wiping her tears away. He firmly holds her waist, painting a transfixed grin onto her face, wanting to pleasure her. She quite likes this, her eyes fervently glue to his.
“Awe gee, you always know how to calm me down.”
“Good. Let’s go, I’ll get you home safely.”
“I know you will,” she says with a marvelously brilliant smile. Her red lipstick, so dramatic against her blond hair, the shimmer of a golden string-necklace accentuating the glow of her skin.
As he leads her down the stairs, he keeps her close, never lets go of her hand. When they reach the ground floor, the exit is blocked off by busted furniture and fly-ridden garbage. She gags.
“Oh that’s the smell of death. How long ya think a body’s been under that heap, huh?”
“Days probably. There’s no other way out, we’re gonna have to cut through the lobby.”
“Where all the thugs hang out? You know they’re not nice guys, Dante, and they don’t like me.”
“No other option.”
He attempts a nonchalant entrance but their presence is still met with hostility.
“The FUCK do you want?” a blitzed out Arkham inmate demands, vexed that they’ve caught him unwittingly stealing coins from the excessively chlorinated fountain. The colorful mosaic on the fountain’s floor, an ode to Venus Lamenting the Death of Adonis, is covered in glistening nickels, dimes and quarters.
“These coins are mine! I saw ‘em first!” the thug blurts, sloshing around, on a klutzy quest to gather as much change as he can find. “The Fountain of Adonis is open territory!”
“They’re all yours, just ignore us,” Dante says, shielding Frances. The two move forward but a second inmate tries to stick his arm up her dress.
“You wearing panties down there, babydoll?“
“Nope,” Dante grabs him by the wrist.
“Ah God, you’re gonna break my wrist, ya stupid jerk! GRAH! Somebody kill this guy!”
“I got ‘em!” a third inmate hollers, and is about to go hand to hand with Dante, but hesitates.
“Whatchu waiting for?! You want him to snap my hand off?!”
“Wait, you a devil? Maybe it’s all the drugs I’m on?”
“Strangle him or something!”
“No, it ain’t worth it. Don’t kill us, devil, just go!”
“Smart decision,” Dante says, letting the second guy go.
Frances locks arms with him closely and blows a raspberry at the two hooligans.
“Na na, na-na na, buh-bye, ya bunch-ah chumps!”
An earnest nun, of all people, hurriedly blocks the exit, getting on her knees and clasping her hands, hatred in her eyes.
“Harlot!”
“Dante, that’s her, that’s the demon! Careful, she’s bigger than she looks.”
“You want your money, harlot? Stay here and serve my Master, my King, my God! Serve him like a good little whore and maybe we’ll throw some pennies by the pole!”
“I’m only gonna tell you this once,” Dante warns, his sword appearing behind his back in a flash. “Back off.”
Frances backs up, tickled, excited to see how he’s going to kill this thing.
“Ooo I love when ya summon your sword from behind your back. Ho boy, that’s real sexy!”
“DANTE!” the devil ragingly cries, her fingers growing disgustingly into claws, her size increasing grotesquely. She summons an iron-plated paddle. It’s solid and stupidly big. She’s about to start a boss fight, but he ruins her big moment by slashing her into mangled meat with three beautifully executed thrusts. She shrieks!
Reeeeeee!
Frances laughs, “Oh she is so dead.”
“What part of back off did you not understand?”
“Yeah baby, cut her ass up like butter, baby!”
No one challenges him after this. They step over the demon-nun’s sizzling carcass and exit the building without any further bloodshed. Frances, turned on like there’s no tomorrow, snatches the dead demon’s paddle on their way out and pulls Dante in for a passionate kiss under the stars.
“Mmm, you taste like honey-liqueur tonight.”
“You taste like cotton candy tonight.”
“Next time, you be the damsel, okay? I wanna save you next time. Deal?”
“Frances, I’m so fuckin’ horny right now. I wanna go back to your place.”
“Really?! Say no more. Let’s get a cab and go home so we can spank each other!”
They jet back to her apartment, luckily with the help of a human cabdriver. When they arrive at her place, she really makes this impromptu get together more than worth his while with a frisky shag.
After rolling around for a little bit, they recline on the floor in a pile of pillows. Cozy in the afterglow, her body lies cuddled next to his, his jacket covering her like a blanket. He carefully turns her onto her back so he can get up and go into her bathroom. She rolls onto something uncomfortable in one of the large inner pockets.
“Oof, whatchu hiding in here, a can of soup?”
She sits up and finds a spray can inside his jacket.
“Oh hey, that’s for you actually. It’s demon repellent.”
She gives him a playful look.
“For me?”
“Yeah babe, for you. You got an extra toothbrush?”
“Yeah, I got a couple. Take a tube of toothpaste if you want. I got the expensive stuff from the Hub.”
“Will do, but if they say Vietnamese Dentist on them, I’m throwing them away.”
“That’s oddly specific, what’s your logic?”
“You ever have a recurring bad dream?”
“Oh all the time. There’s the one where I accidentally handcuff myself to a bomb at the GCPD, the one where Pammy won’t stop kissing Nightwing, the one where I drop my egg sandwich. I got lots of bad dreams. What’s yours?”
“I’m at the Vietnamese Dentist and all my teeth start falling out.”
“Teeth falling out is actually a really common nightmare. It can mean a bunch of things, but it’s got nothing to do with losing all your teeth, so don’t worry, pookie pie.”
“Good to know. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome, puddin’.”
He goes into the bathroom. She yawns and lies back down.
When he’s done, he pockets the toothbrush and some toothpaste, and goes back into the barren living room, to the floor, where he crawls on top of her and bearhugs her.
“I’m really sorry, honey, but I gotta go soon. You know devils are attracted to me. I don’t want ‘em coming here while you’re trying to sleep.”
She holds him closely, wrapping her leg around him and nuzzling his chest…
“One more snuggle, Devil Hunter?”
“Sure.”
“Can I tell ya a story?”
“Do it.”
“It’s called, Who Killed The Joker?”
“Oh, this I gotta hear.”
“Once upon a time, I used to know a guy they called, The Joker. He was an all around rotten guy. Now me, I like bad boys. Kinda like you. Course, you’re way prettier and ya don’t lead me on like he did.”
“His loss.”
“Ya see, he wasn’t really into me like I thought he was. Truth is, the guy only got real turned on when he was torturing people. Kind of a piece of shit, that Joker.”
“And you liked him because?”
“Because I was lonely, bored, and dumb.”
“You’re not dumb.”
“Now, me and Joker, see, we ran around Gotham for a while. He made a lot of promises to me. Never delivered on any of them. I dunno why I thought he would. The grooming was long and the fling was short. So, I’ll cut to the good part. You’re gonna like it.”
“Let’s hear it.”
“One day, he was feeling ready to take our relationship up a notch, and decided the best way to bond, would be to strangle me to death. Thought it’d be a funny joke, was laughing the whole time. That’s when something snapped in me, and I got this wacky idea that it would be an even funnier joke to bash his brains in! We wrestled near a bat and I grabbed it and hit him so hard, I cracked his skull!”
“Hell yeah!”
“Then I got up and hit him a couple more times!”
“That’s my girl!”
“When the cops showed up, they didn’t even recognize him! Heehee, I couldn’t stop laughing! And that’s what happened to Mr. J! What’d ya think?”
“And here I was, thinking you couldn’t get any hotter. Great story, Frances. I’m proud of you.”
“I hate seeing demons that look like him. He was a real bad man. Anyway, thanks for being my pal. Mmm, such a prince. I’m gonna dream about you tonight, Dante.”
They both sit up. He rubs her arm, sending tingles down her spine. She gives him a pouty frown as he puts on his jacket.
“I’ll come by tomorrow and bring you some food.”
He kisses her neck.
“You’re so sweet. I don’t really deserve it, ya know.”
“Are you kidding? You killed the Joker. The real Joker. From what I know about that guy, you may have saved the world, Frances.”
She watches him lace up his boots and let himself out. He makes sure to lock the door from the inside before leaving. This gives her a chance to blow him a kiss. To that, he smirks as she flirts.
“Bye sweetie. Call me, Dante.”